我們常常被外界的期待和壓力所影響，忘記了自己真正的需要和價值。總是追求外在的成就，以獲得別人的認同，使我們變得緊張和焦慮。這是變相為別人而活，會讓我們感到自己像一個工具，而不是僅僅存在就有價值。當我們懷疑自己的存在價值，就會產生消極的心態。因此，我們需要學會為真正的自己而活，從而認識自己的真正價值。
我們常常基於他人的期望，建立起一個暫時的自我意識，並為這個虛假的自己而活。例如，父母可能希望我們成為鋼琴家，刻意培養甚至強迫我們練習鋼琴，讓我們誤以為成為鋼琴家就是為自己而活。在發現自己的真正需要之前，我們會長期堅守這個虛假的自己，並習慣為父母而活，而不是為真正的自己而活。
習慣於為別人而活，我們就會受情緒所驅動。當生活缺乏目標，我們會感到焦慮。如果忙於實現一個接一個的目標，我們就會感到精力充沛。這種由情緒帶來的存在感，會讓我們過度注重自己的工具價值，而忽視自己的內在價值，最終導致消極。例如，我們可能後悔不斷為家庭而付出，卻忽視了自己對身體、情感的健康，以及自我成長的需要。
為了獲得真正的存在感，我們必須為真正的自己而活。這需要我們擺脫為別人而活的習慣，以及不斷行動的觀念。因為這些習慣和觀念不僅會讓我們忽略內心世界的實踐，也會導致我們為別人的認可而做事，使我們的生活變得複雜和混亂。擺脫這些習慣和觀念，目的是擺脫那個虛假的自己，讓生活變回單純。
我們真正的目標是成長，而不是成就。如果長期忙碌於各種事務，很可能削弱我們的身心健康。我們需要意識到，如果失去生命，我們將無法繼續成長，這時所有外在成就都將變得微不足道。因此，即使我們追求成就，也應該將存在和成長放在首位。否則，我們所追求的外在目標，可能會與內在目標發生衝突，造成內心混亂，耗費大量的生命力。
要有效發揮生命力，我們需要從意識中發現和理解自己的真正需要。深入自己的內心，思考甚麼是真正的自己，或者誰是真正的自己，以及甚麼事物能讓自己感到滿足，我們能發現自己的需要。認識身體的需要，認識自我的欲望，我們可以更加認識真正的自己。這是一個從外到內認識自己的旅程。
認識自己，能促進我們的成長，並在成長路上自然地獲得成就。這種成就是成長的副產物，不僅能繼續促進我們的成長，還會對別人有幫助。例如，認識到自己的創造力，我們能創造出一些有利生活的事物。因此，我們無須刻意地去獲得成就，或者為了別人而行動。擺脫刻意的作為，並處於自由的心境中，我們會更容易發揮自己的創造力，並發現自己的優勢。
我們的所有行動，都應該圍繞著"如何持續存在"這個問題來展開。雖然世界已為生命準備了一切物質，但生命卻無法永恆存在。為解決這個問題，我們需要從身體健康、情緒平衡和意識培養等方面著手，尋找真正屬於自己的生活方式。我們可以考慮將自己從忙碌中解脫出來，放下對物質成就和外部認可的執念，轉而關注內在的進步與提升。這需要我們對物質和精神有全面的認識。
我們需要生命，所以需要物質、情緒和正確的意識。身體是物質層面，包括感官和感覺，是我們的生命主幹。感覺帶來感受，並帶動我們的情緒，形成習慣。這是一個心理層面，是身體與意識聯繫的橋樑。我們的自我意識也處於這個層面上，可統稱之為自我。情緒使我們進一步感知外界，產生一個包含時間和空間的完整意識，並控制身體的活動。我們就是這個完整的意識，生命的最終持有者和控制者，或稱為靈魂。如果以一個細胞來作比喻，身體就像細胞壁，自我像細胞質，靈魂像細胞核。這意味著，我們處於身體、自我和靈魂結合體的核心，需要為這三者作出協調，並不斷修正認知，才能讓自己全方位發展。
身體是暫時的。自我則由經驗、情緒和習慣所組成，固執卻不穩定。只有靈魂具備永恆的本質。透過這三方面，我們可以辨別出自己的最終需要。身體對我們最重要，因為我們無法離開身體。我們對自我也有某種程度的依賴，因為它有時候能協助我們保存身體，特別是我們無意識的時候。實際上，我們最需要的是靈魂的存在和成長，所以需要不斷提高意識。這就是為真正的自己而活的含義。
為真正的自己而活，我們需要與生命充份地合作。為了平衡地使用身體，使其長久持續，我們需要學習健康飲食和運動的方法。同時，我們也需要學習心理學知識，追求健康的成就感，處理好情緒並打破習慣，從自我手中取回生命的控制權。為了提高意識，我們需要更重視對精神世界的思考和實踐，並建立良好的人際關係，尤其是相愛的關係。這對我們的成長有極大的幫助。另一方面，當我們忙於處理外部世界的事情時，應該時刻緊記生命的需要，一切考慮以生命為先，保持健康、合理的自私心態。
換句話說，我們不僅需要拓展生活的邊界，積累物質財富，還需要擺脫習慣和情緒的束縛，掌控好自己的生命。我們也需要與別人建立深度連結，形成一個意識整體，拓展存在的空間。透過互相促進，可以擴闊我們的視野。不斷學習、反思和成長，可以培養我們對生命和環境的深度意識，從而活出真正的自己。
這種深度關注內心的生活方式，既是對我們的考驗和挑戰，也是實現一個真正自己的過程。我們的需求來自對繼續存在的需要，我們的價值則來自實現生命的目標。只有了解真正的自己、滿足自己的需求，並實現自己的價值，做到為真正的自己而活，我們才能找到內心的寧靜。
我們勇敢地走自己的路，並在前進中不斷修正自己的思想和行為。我們在不違背生命需要的前提下，努力進行物質和精神上的創造。這不僅創造健康長壽的身體，還創造出生命間的緊密連結，一起邁向永恆存在的目標。這就是為真正的自己而活。
77. 為未來而活好當下 (上一篇)
79. 以行動創造更美好的明天 (下一篇)
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The path to Tranquility (78)
Living for our true self
We are often influenced by external expectations and pressures and forget our true needs and values. Always pursuing external achievements to gain approval from others makes us nervous and anxious. This is living for others in disguise, making us feel like a tool rather than having value just by existing. When we doubt the value of our existence, we will have a negative attitude. Therefore, we need to learn to live for our true self to recognize our true value.
We often build a temporary sense of self based on the expectations of others and live for this false self. For example, our parents may want us to become pianists, deliberately cultivate or even force us to practice piano, making us mistakenly think that becoming a pianist means living for ourselves. Before discovering our true needs, we stick to this self for a long time and become accustomed to living for our parents instead of living for our true self.
When we get used to living for others, we become driven by our emotions. If our lives lack purpose, we will feel anxious. We feel energized if we are busy achieving one goal after another. This sense of existence brought about by emotions will cause us to focus too much on our instrumental value and ignore our intrinsic value, which ultimately leads to negativity. For example, we may regret that we continue to contribute to our family while neglecting our own needs for physical, emotional health, and self-growth.
In order to achieve a true sense of being, we must live for our true self. This requires us to break away from the habit of living for others and the idea of constant action. Because they not only cause us to ignore the practice of our inner world, but also cause us to do things for the approval of others, making our lives complicated and confusing. The purpose of getting rid of these habits and concepts is to get rid of the false self and return to simplicity in life.
Our true goal is growth, not achievement. If we are busy with various affairs for a long time, it is likely to weaken our physical and mental health. We need to realize that if we lose life, we will not be able to continue to grow, and at this time all external achievements will become insignificant. Therefore, even if we pursue achievements, we should put existence and growth first. Otherwise, the external goals we pursue may conflict with internal goals, cause inner confusion, and consume a lot of vitality.
To effectively exert vitality, we need to discover and understand our true needs from consciousness. Delving into our hearts, thinking about what is the true self, or who is the true self, and what can make us feel satisfied, we can discover our needs. Recognizing the needs of the body, recognizing the desires of the ego, we can better recognize the true self. This is a journey from the outside to the inside to recognize our self.
Knowing our self can promote our growth and naturally achieve achievements on the road to growth. This achievement is a by-product of growth, not only can continue to promote our growth, but also help others. For example, when we recognize our creativity, we can create things that benefit our lives. So, we do not need to deliberately pursue achievements, or act for others. Freed from deliberate actions and in a state of freedom, we are more likely to exert our creativity and discover our advantages.
All our actions should revolve around the question of "how to continue to exist". Although the world has prepared everything for life, life cannot exist forever. To solve this problem, we need to start from physical health, emotional balance, and consciousness cultivation, and find a lifestyle that truly belongs to us. We can consider freeing ourselves from busyness, letting go of the obsession with material achievements and external recognition, and turning to focus on internal progress and improvement. This requires us to have a comprehensive understanding of matter and spirit.
We need life, so we need material, emotions and correct consciousness. The body is the physical plane, including the senses and sensations, and is the backbone of our life. Sensations bring about feelings and drive our emotions and form habits. This is a psychological level, a bridge between body and consciousness. Our self-awareness is also on this level and can be collectively called the ego. Emotions allow us to further perceive the outside world, generate a complete consciousness that includes time and space, and control body activities. We are this complete consciousness, the ultimate holder and controller of life, or called the soul. If we use a cell as an analogy, the body is like the cell wall, the ego is like the cytoplasm, and the soul is like the nucleus. This means that we are at the core of the combination of body, ego and soul. We need to coordinate these three and constantly revise our cognition in order to develop ourselves in all directions.
The body is temporary. The ego is made up of experiences, emotions, and habits, and is stubborn but unstable. Only the soul possesses the essence of eternity. Through these three aspects, we can discern our ultimate needs. The body is most important to us because we cannot leave it. We also have a certain degree of reliance on the ego because it sometimes helps us preserve our bodies, especially when we are unconscious. In fact, what we need most is the existence and growth of the soul, so we need to constantly improve our consciousness. This is what it means to live for our true self.
To live for our true selves, we need to fully cooperate with the life. In order to use the body in a balanced way so that it lasts for a long time, we need to learn how to eat and exercise healthily. At the same time, we also need to learn psychological knowledge, pursue a healthy sense of accomplishment, handle emotions well and break habits, and take back the control of life from ego. For raising consciousness, we need to pay more attention to thinking and practicing the spiritual world, and establishing good interpersonal relationships, especially mutual loving relationships. This has been a huge help to our growth. On the other hand, when we are busy dealing with things in the external world, we should always keep the needs of life in mind, put life first in all considerations, and maintain a healthy and reasonable selfish mentality.
In other words, we not only need to expand the boundaries of life and accumulate material wealth, but we also need to get rid of the constraints of habits and emotions and take control of our lives. We also need to establish deep connections with others to form a whole consciousness and expand the space of existence. Through mutual promotion, we can broaden our horizons. Continuous learning, reflection and growth can cultivate our deep consciousness of life and environment, thus live out the true self.
This lifestyle of deeply focusing on the inner world is both a test and challenge for us, and a process of realizing a true self. Our needs come from the need to continue to exist, and our value comes from achieving the goal of life. Only by understanding the true self, satisfying our own needs, and realizing our own value, and achieving living for the true self, can we find inner tranquility.
We bravely follow our own path and constantly revise our thoughts and behaviors as we move forward. We strive to create materially and spiritually without violating the needs of life. This not only creates a healthy and long-lived body, but also creates a close connection between lives, moving together towards the goal of eternal existence. This is living for our true self.
On July 20, 2023
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